As I hinted last time, today's post is a guest post from the lovely Helen over at
Where there's a Wills.
Helen is another large family mum who like myself has heard it all. Here's her take on it.
Large Family thoughts
How do we determine our family size? Is it by being committed to
being open to life, religious beliefs, a desire to have children, the influence
of society or the circumstances of life. The decision will be different for
everyone —for some the decision will be one or two children, for others far
more than that.
Large families are
seen less and less. So when we are out together we tend to draw our fair share
of attention and questions. People are naturally curious as to the
logistics of having a big family; it's actually not as daunting as many people
may think! We have 7 and they didn’t appear on the doorstep all at once (thank
goodness). Most people have silly and sometimes rude
comments when asking how many children we have. Maybe I was born in the wrong
century because I love being a Mummy to many and society today frowns upon
those of us who choose to have more than the average.
Here’s how
society’s perception of family size appears from my perspective:
Child No. 1: Everyone is
entitled to have a child. Doesn’t matter what it is as long as it’s healthy.
Child No. 2: You can
have number 2 as long as it’s the opposite sex from your first. “That’s great!
A boy and A girl,” “So now you’re done”.
Child No. 3: “Oh you
have 2 boys, so you must be trying for a girl” If you blow it and get another
of the same, too bad.
Child No. 4: ”Now you’re
just getting ridiculous”, “ you need a larger car”.
Child No.5: When you go
out people ask “Are they all yours”? Family and friends start to question your
sanity. “Don’t you know what causes it”?
Child No. 6: Surly this
has to be it. Your mental status is now confirmed, “yep your nuts”.
Child No. 7: So now you
don’t even fit into the Tarago “What are you going to do”? Eye rolls, and
whispers.
You don’t have to be crazy, a Catholic or a Mormon to have a large
family. Some of us actually just love it. All the fun, craziness, up’s and
down’s that it brings. In this day and age, having a large family is often thought of as either irresponsible or a
lack of concern for the environment–both of which are far from the truth.
Having a large family is an amazing experience for me as a mother, as I watch
my children grow into health, well-adjusted children I am happy with the choice
we made.
